To Daryl Gross and Oliver Luck, Esqs.
The Pinstripe Bowl matches up teams from the Big East and Big XII. Please, please make sure it is Syracuse vs. West Virginia.
Just think of it. This was the first season since 1955 that SU and WVU did not meet on the gridiron. 57 years. We can rectify that terrible sad situation, at least for one more year, in throaty defiance of the realignment gods. All the history would come flowing back. The Ben Schwartzwalder trophy would be once more up for grabs. It would add so many layers of meaning to a mostly meaningless game. The fans would devour this game like Kobayashi devouring Hofmann’s hot dogs, or like flames devouring a couch (whichever metaphor is more meaningful to you).
I know that the Pinstripe gets only the 4th choice from among the Big East teams. Syracuse could end up being in 2nd place in the conference standings (depending on tonight’s Rutgers-Louisville result, as well as Cincinnati-UConn on Saturday) but that would not mean they’d have to go to the Citrus Bowl. Let the Louisville-Rutgers loser go there. Let Cincinnati go to the Belk Bowl, who picks third. Pull whatever strings you must so that SU goes back to Yankee Stadium. For goodness sake, you inexplicably spent big money to have an SU advertisement in their outfield throughout baseball season. It may as well mean something. New York’s College Team should be in New York’s premiere college football game. I don’t care about scheduling, prestige, or payouts. This is where they belong. The Belk Bowl, after all, pits a Big East team against an ACC squad that SU will be playing anyway for years to come. Use whatever influence you have with the ACC bosses to get them, in turn, to convince the Belk folks to avoid a mere ACC regular season preview. They don’t need Syracuse anyway to fill their seats, as they will have their pick of UNC or NC State to bring out the home crowd. The Big East participant is irrelevant to their success. So make them take Cincy and leave SU where it belongs.
Your job is much easier. The Pinstripe Bowl gets 7th pick from among the Big XII’s bowl-eligible teams. West Virginia currently sits in 7th place in the standings. This should be a slam-dunk. As the easternmost school in the conference (for the moment) you are by far the closest to New York, and thus the obvious choice for the Pinstripe Bowl. Of the five non-BCS bowls picking before Pinstripe, three are located in Texas, one is in Arizona and one is in California. The five teams that will naturally be picked for these are the ones ahead of you in the standings, who are all from Texas and Oklahoma and thus are better fits for those games anyway. So WVU will most likely still be available when the Pinstripe is choosing its Big XII team. All you have to do is convince them not to take Baylor or Iowa State. Do this, and Syracuse will in turn make sure that Dwight Freeney doesn’t “accidentally” take your boy Andrew’s head off in practice.
Thanks for your consideration. We eagerly await the official announcement of this obviously most sensible pairing.
the Cuse Country staff